It’s become clear to me as I write about honesty and integrity that almost all of the reasons for avoiding my truth are about fear. Again.
- I was afraid to disappoint anyone.
- I was afraid to fail.
- I was afraid of being ignored (because that meant I wasn’t important).
- I didn’t want to be alone.
- I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.
I realize now (after lots of work) that my most foundational fear – remember all those blogs about fear and its root? – is that I am not good enough to love.
When I walked through the world with that belief at my core, all of my choices and behaviors were focused on proving that I was, in fact, good enough to love.
And who would love someone who disagreed with them? Or hurt them? Or disappointed them? Or failed? No one (or at least, so I thought)! This belief meant I consistently chose pleasing others, meeting their needs, and saying yes to their perspective (no matter what my little voice inside – my truth – said) to feel lovable and worthy.
The problem? With each round of doing for others and seeking my worth in that way, I ended up creating a self-fulfilling prophesy. I proved my worth by doing, and so I always needed to do to feel worthy.
So, my constant fear of not being good enough was renewed every time I acted to prove I was good enough. Trying to keep that fear at bay actually reinforced it, because my relationships only worked if I was playing the role of agreeable, supportive, helpful me.
It was a cycle I didn’t know I’d created until it was too late. I certainly didn’t know how to stop it on my own.
This is why I am so passionate about helping others find out what their truth is – because I know in my heart how painful it is to live without it.
This is my mission … to give you the tools to break your cycle (whatever that is), get to your deepest truth, to accept it, and to love your Self unconditionally from that place.
THAT IS WHAT YOU WERE MADE FOR. THAT IS WHERE YOUR POWER, PLACE, AND PURPOSE RESIDE.
In your truth.
How long do you want to wait to find it? How much more of other people’s truth can you live by? When is it going to be your turn?